Halloween in Halloween Town: Special Edition
by Sansai Sarinatan
Summary: A zany Halloween party in Halloween Town! CHAPTER NINE ADDED: The end of our delightful little tale! A bit of Tidus and Selphie pairing, plus there's a Numa Numa Dance Party! WHEEEEEEEEE!
1. Six years isn't enough for Wakka!

Disclaimer: I do not own Kingdom Hearts, Jack Skellington, or any other things in this story. All I own is this story, and occasionally myself popping up all over the place, but not in this chapter.

Author's note: This whole story will be in two different POV's, Sora's, and Jack's (from Nightmare Before Christmas, or from Halloween Town for those who hasn't seen the movie), and the first chapter is in Sora's POV. Now, this is my first fan fiction, so flames are welcome.

EDIT: If you have seen this fanfic before, yes, I originally posted this in 2003. However, unsatisfied with it, I gave it up. Now, I am finally more confident with my writing skills, I am going to continue this story. Unfortunately, I put little effort in editing my old noobish stuff, so it's gonna be hard to read.

Halloween in Halloween Town, POV 1:

Sora It was a lazy, autumn day on the islands, like usual. Riku was sitting around the stream, batting around the keychain on his Oblivion Keyblade, Kairi was paddling along the shore in a row boat, Selphie was walking around the dock, Tidus was on the beach, chewing a fish bone, and Wakka was sitting against a cocoanut tree, reading "How to Speak English in Six Years", which didn't help him much.

I was on top of the Seaside Shack, shining my Oathkeeper Keyblade, and occasionally scratching at the bandages on my arm. Yeah, you guessed it, we were bored. And we would have dead bored right now if it weren't for two things: One, Donald and Goofy had visited earlier, Goofy was trying to surf (even though there wasn't any sign of wind today), and Donald was collecting cocoanuts for dinner later, by whacking the cocoanut tree with his Dream Staff, randomly hitting Wakka in the head.

Two, for the fact that something crashed a few miles away, and we were all anxious to know what it was. Donald had a full barrel of cocoanuts by the time he noticed the bandage.

"Shorah! What happened to yer arm!" Quacked Donald, almost dropping a few cocoanuts. "Kairi." I replied. "Apparently she had been PMSing a few days before you got here, and she got mad and stabbed me in the arm with a fork. But, she has stopped today." I held up my arm sadly.

"Women scars my friend." Said Donald while taking in a deep sigh. "Women scars. Once Daisy nearly cut my wing off when on her time of the month!" I nodded, and watched Kairi ran up to me, with a curious glint in her eyes.

"Hey Sora!" She called out. "You know, for about a year now I have been wondering if I should ask you this but, how did you and Riku get back? I thought traveling through space was impossible after Ansem was defeated!"

"Well," I started. After we found the other door to the light, we found King Mickey and Riku, who had found a powerful Gummi Block, that could solve the whole world travel problem! The Gummi Block had the power to turn the whole ship when trying to leave a world, into light. Mickey explained that the only thing that could get past the impassible walls is light, which made Gummi Ship Travel possible now! And, he also said that all the worlds in Kingdom Hearts got a Gummi shower of the new Gummi blocks, and all the other kinds."

"AKA, the author pulled out some explanation out of his ass." Kairi said, and was about to go to the shack when all the sudden something jumped out of the trees! It was tall, skinny, and let out a frightening wail! Nobody moved, especially the drenched Goofy. Then, as he walked into the sunlight, I instantly knew whom what it was.

"Jack!" Me, Donald, and Goofy asked in unison.

"Of course!" He said, stretching his bony arms. "There is no animal or man who can scream like I can!" His horrifying glare turned into a innocent, goofy looking smile.

"But how did you get here? And why?" I Asked, how I was still holding my keyblade tensely.

"Well, first of all," He began. "I built my own ship from the Gummi blocks I found in a meteor shower. My ship was based off of the Diablo blueprint, except for a few alterations, of course. And my mean of coming here is to invite you all to the yearly Halloween Party!"

Oh yeah! Today was Halloween! How could I forget! And I didn't even have a costume!

"I think there is need of introduction here." Said Jack. "My Name is Jack Skellington, a friend of Sora's. We met in my home world, Halloween Town, when he sealed the keyhole." All my friends nodded. "Now, I have gone over a few plans for the party, so I will need to gather some of you up a little later. But for now, I have to go repair my ship, I got a bad hit from a meteor and crashed here. Say, Donald, Sora, since you two are experts at this sort of mess, can you help me with the repairs?"

"Why not?" Said Donald, who was batting around a cocoanut. I agreed with him, and ran of to follow Jack.


	2. Your stupid!

Halloween in Halloween Town, POV 2

Jack

I rushed into the tropical forest of the island, hoping to fix the fallen ship. Sora and Donald were trying to keep up, so I decided to slow down my pace. In about two minutes we found the sad remains of my ship. I watched Sora and Donald run up, and stared in awe.

"What kind of Meteor did yer hit Jack?" Quacked Donald, as he started to mend the ship. "The wings are ripped, the engines have burst, the radar has snapped, the armour is charcoal, and the cockpit has shattered!" He grabbed a wrench and tapped his foot curiously. I sighed, and tried to remember what happened up their.

"Well," I began. "It really wasn't a meteor at all.You see, I had just taken a rest stop at Hallow Bastion, and was heading to my next and last stop, your Island. I was thinking of the conversation I had with these nice people named Leon and Yuffie, when all the sudden I noticed a Leviathan Gummi Ship, which was on my tail. I thought it was a Heartless ship for a second, but my radar signal only picked up that one ship. I knew it wasn't a Heartless ship, for the fact that Heartless always appear in numbers. So, I decided not to pay to much attention to the anonymous driver, thinking he was just a friendly traveler, just exploring other worlds. I was about to continue to listen to a song on the radio called "Simple and Clean", when all the sudden the ship's Sheild was starting to drop! Soon, the Sheild was gone and my armour was being damaged! I noticed that the ship behind me was attacking me! Freighted, I put my ship into Haste2 Mode, and tried to speed away. The other ship Hasted too! I tried to dodge, but I couldn't, the other ship was too fast! At some point, we were near your world, so I turned around, and started firing all I had at him! Both of our ships crashed here after a few blasts at each other, and now I'm here. I came to my senses a hour later, and I was met by a terrible surprise! A man, about my height, was glaring at me! He wore a black cloak, had big black boots, and had a black rose symbol on his forehead. He looked young, and was carrying a small dagger! I decided to fight him, or at least try to scare him off. My Agility and my magic was able to help me win. He ran off some where, and I walked down to where you guys were. I think you remember the rest."

"Oh." Said Donald, who was already half done on the repair work, while Sora was handing him extra Gummi Blocks to replace unfixable ones. Sora scratched his head in confusion.

"Who was that person who tried to kill you?" He asked. "And why?" I sighed and looked down at my feet.

"I don't know." I replied. "I just don't know."

Later, Donald had finished work on the Diablo, and I had called up Riku to ask something, which I had been long anxious to ask.

"Hey Riku," I started. "I heard from sources from the Hollow Bastion that you once had the power to control the Heartless, do you still have that power?" Riku scratched his chin and held up his keyblade, which looked something similar to the Pumpkin Head Keychain which Sora used on some visits to Halloween Town.

"Well, it's been a while, but I think I can still do it." He said. His keyblade glowed blue, and a small Shadow heartless scurried up to him."

"Splendid!" I said. "Now, I know you have probably heard about how I wanted to have a Heartless Halloween, and I want you to help me make it happen! So, what do you say?" He thought for a long time before he could reply.

"I guess so." He said. "But I am really not to sure. I mean, The Heartless aren't really things to toy with, but if anything goes wrong, we can wipe them out." I nodded, and went out to address the islanders. They were all dressed up in costumes, even Riku gotten into costume quick enough. He look like the Headless Horse man, sense his big robes covered him, but I could see a small patch of silver. Kairi was dressed up as a Egyptian Queen or something, Selphie was a black cat, Tidus was a Pirate, and Wakka was dressed up as a Lion. Sora, Donald, and Goofy were dressed up in the costumes they wore while they were in my world.

"Hey look guys, I'm a bear!" Said Wakka happily. And by that time, Selphie and Tidus had already gotten into a (cough) 'Intelligent' conversation.

"Your stupid." She started.

"No, YOUR stupid. He replied.

"Your stupid."

"Your stupid."

"Your stupid."

"Your stupid."

"Your stupid."

I cleared my voice to silence them, and began to talk.

"I thank you all for wanting to come! This Halloween, you all will be surely scared out of your wits! You will have fun, eat candy, show off your costumes, and scare back some other people while you are at it! And you all can come!" They all cheered. "Except for you." I Pointed at Wakka, who then looked glum, and was about to walk away when a Cocoanut Tree fell on top of him. Donald walked sheepishly away, holding a barrel of cocoanuts.

"Hehehe, I guess I don't know my own strength. Heh?" He said. Everybody shrugged, and I led the way to the Gummi Ship...


	3. Now with 99 precent less anal probes!

Disclaimer: I do not own Kingdom Hearts, Jack Skellington, or any other things in this story. All I own is this story, and occasionally myself popping up all over the place, but not in this chapter. I also do not own Kain and Kodos, from The Simpsons, though if I did I would use them to zap my school into oblivion.

Author's note: Sorry I haven't updated for so damn long! I've been doing other things. And no, they wont reach Halloween Town just yet, first that have to get in their Gummi Ships, go to Hallow Bastion for a rest stop, skip Neverland, and they'll be their. And after this chapter, you guys can tell I know a nice bit about Gummies, and I am even making my own model soon. Anyways, on with the story.

Sora

We led the rest to the three Gummi ships that we parked on the old dock. Jack led, walking quickly and dashingly, something like a spider after it's prey! The gummi ships were of the following:

Glammdring, the Hyperion Model. This is the ship I made when Donald wouldn't let me drive his because when at the wheel I am a "Danger drone nut ready to blow." The next ship was Skellingtn, The Diablo model. Well, okay it was a bit different. It was orange with a bit of black, There were a bit more gummies on it, most of them were useless Esuna's. But overall, it handled very nicely, by speed and power, it could deffently could take my ship on, even though my ship is one of the strongest around! The last one was old Donald and Goofy's clinker, The Excalibur, and old Kingdom Model. It's slow and it's fire power is weak. But, so that Donald and Goof' aren't left behind, Jack tied a rope connected to his ship to their ship, so that they couldn't get separated. So, now it was time to decide who goes in each ship.

"I get Sora's ship!" Said Kairi, instantly running into Glammdring, turning on the radio, and pulls out my secret "Chips Ahoy!" stash. Riku insisted he wanted to go in my ship so he followed Kairi in.

"Well I want to go in Jack's ship!" Said Selphie. "He's strong, he's dreamy, and alot more handsomer then you!" She pulled her eyelid down and sticked her tounge at Tidus, and walked up to Jack, hugging him.

"Uh, I am already taken! Sorry!" Said Jack as he started to back away into his ship.

"By Sally?" I asked.

"Yes."

Disappointed, Selphie walked into Skellingtn (yes, I am leaving out the "O" on perpose, sence that is what Jack named the ship. Exactly that. Too many characters, sadly.)

"Oh yeah!" Challenged Tidus. "Well, uh, Donald! I'll go with her! She's cute, sexy, and hot, unlike you!" He sticked his tongue at Selphie.

"I'm a guy!" Said Donald angerly.

"Oh." Tidus blushed and walked into Excalibur, which he hardly stepped a foot into when a bit of wing crumbled off.

Me, Jack, Donald, and Goofy went into our ships, and blasted off. But before we left, I saw Wakka streaking across the beach, while I could see Selphie keeping close watch, and Tidus looking mighty angry. As soon as we left the atmosphere, we started to pass the countless obstacles, yet it was all much simpler then before, sense there were no heartless ships. The only thing I saw was a shattered old OMEGA gummi ship, which was covered with laser holes. Must have been an old ship I shot down. I thought. Kairi kept on snacking, I was steering (of course), and Riku was searching through the radio stations. A little less then 10 minutes of travel, Riku had found MGLE99.1, and this song called "Simple and Clean" started playing. It played a second time after that, a much more slower version then before, and we were already starting to learn the words.

"When you walk away," Kairi sang. "You don't here me say, Please, Oh baby, Don't go! CRUNCH!" Kairi had eaten about half a bag full of my cookies.

"Heh, save that for the party Kairi." Riku said, who had started to search around more stations, when all the sudden the power stopped.

"Wah!" I exclaimed. Then I saw a small ship which looked something like the basic UFO in those alien movies that were always on the TRUTHISOUTTHERE Channel back home. Then, the transmission screen lighted up and two green aliens, which looked a bit like octopuses with sharp teeth and drool at the mouth. One of them had a blue badge on, the other a red one.

"Greetings Island Lifeforms! I am Kain, and this is my sister Kodos! Said the one with the blue badge.

"Hello!" Said Kodos, which turned out to be the red badge.

"We have came to warn you that a star has gone out, and will try and have poor, innocent souls be sacrificed, and these souls will be taken from Neopia!"

"What exactly does that have to apply with us!" I asked Kain.

"...Sorry! My bad! Carry on!" Kain ended the transmission, and the rest of the power turned on. Then, the transmission screen lit up again, this time it was Jack.

"Woah! Did you see that ship!" Asked Jack. "It was right on your tail! And it was so fast, it disappeared as fast as suddenly as it appeared! Are you guys alright?"

"We're fine!" Kairi said before popping another cookie in her mouth.

"The power was out, and we got some really pointless message, but in most cases, I'm game!" Said Riku., who started playing "The Yellow Submarine".

"I'm alright." I said.

"Well you know what guys?" Said Jack. "With that whole disruption, we completely missed Hallow Bastion, and were thrown into a whole new path, leading straight to Halloween Town! We'll be their in no time!" He ended the message, and left us on our own. After a while, Jack came up on the radar, and soon Donald and both their crew, taking the lead. After a short while, Halloween Town came into view, and we both departure...

To be continued.

Notes: Once again, I am sorry for the late chapter! I have school work and all that stuff, so I am very busy. Oh well. Just three more months!


	4. Public Drinking and White Floppy things!

Disclaimer: I do not own Kingdom Hearts or Nightmare Before Christmas! Though if I did, I would have Donald blow things up more, and Kairi a bit older, have Oogie Boogie be from Brooklyn, and have Lock, Shock, and Barrel chop someone's head off.

Authors Note: Is seen sobbing like crazy I'M SORRY! I HAVEN'T HAD WRITERS BLOCK! I AM JUST LAZY! SOB PLEASE DON'T HURT ME! I HAVE THE WHOLE STORY IN MY HEAD! I WILL UPDATE MORE! I SWEAR! And I will follow both Nightmare1's and Keyblade Mastah's requests! Just you wait!

Jack

It was 9:00 PM. Just an hour away from the most spooktacular performance that will even make the most brave hearted gasp in horror! The decorations were set, bats fluttered across the land, the heartless menacingly stood at their wait, waiting for Riku's lead, all my guests, from this world, and many, many other worlds lingered and socialized, the-

"Riku your hand's in the toaster!" Screamed Kairi.

"Wah- AHHHH! AHHHH! GETITOFFGETITOFF! AAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUGGHHHHHH!" I witnessed Riku running around screaming, hoping that he does not anything foolish during the performance. Then Riku let him self free from his prison, and sighed in relief. "Ahh, thank god that is over."

"Your hand is in it again!" Yelled Peter Pan, who was mostly digging into the worm's wort stew when he managed to look up, for one reason or another.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUU!" Riku smashed the toaster into the wall and managed to break it, ending its rain of terror forever. Then I saw Sora, who was walking up to me, with a large scroll which I knew, had to be from The Mayor himself.

"Hey Jack," He called. "I got a something from The Mayor, it's about the plans you made for this Halloween!"

"Splendid!" I replied. "Get Riku over here to review the plans again!" He nodded, and motioned to Riku to come over here. As soon as he got here, I took the scroll from Sora's hands, and read the performance section. "'The performance will start with The Ghosts, Ghouls, Zombies, Heartless, and many other creatures to sing and dance, and I immagine the Heartless performance will be most noted at that. Then Sora, dressed as Ichobad Crane, and Riku as the Headless Horseman, will ride across the party area on Ghost Stallions, and Riku will throw a flaming Pumpkin at Sora. Sora will fall into the fountain, and I will be wearing the same style of clothing Sora wore, and make a ghostly, haunting rise from the grave.' How do you like it?"

"Not bad." Riku stated. "Yet I would have to have someone else control the heartless while I do my bit."

"That can be arranged." Then, out of nowhere, a tall man, wearing a strange black outfit, with long silver hair walked in on us.

"Sephiroth?" Sora looked confused as he said it. "What are you doing here?"

"Well well, someone forgot to invite me to the party-" He was interrupted by Tidus.

"Okay, you quoted a crappy villain from a Spyro The Dragon Game, why should I fear you?" And with that, well, lets just say Tidus was air born for about ten seconds.

"Anyways, I have the power to control the heartless to, just like old Ansem did. Too bad that after Kingdom Hearts was sealed, he lost that power completely." Sephiroth was fingering a long, well forged keyblade, which I believe now, is called "One Winged Angel" or something. Ansem snorted at that remark.

"Just because I am not evil anymore, that doesn't make me completely weak!"

"I did not mention that, though I will get on that some other time. I am going elsewhere, see you." He walked away somewhere, probably around where Oogie, Hades, and Iago were chatting.

"I hate that guy!" Yelled Riku, with his fists clenched.

"You mean you hate your own father?" Ansem answered smugly.

"WHAT!" Riku's eyes went wide, and he walked to the snack bar, muttering how his life was damned from the beginning. I sighed, and went to inspect the party. Yuffie, Squall, Cloud, Aerith, and Ansem were somewhere around the town hall, discussing something about movies, Sora, Riku, and Kairi were at the snack bar, trying to calm the shocked Riku down. Peter Pan, Tinkerbell, and some of the Lost Boys were chatting with Lock, Shock, and Barrel, or Oogie's Boys as people called them. Aladdin, Abu, Genie, and Jasmine were in the stone pumpkin head, talking about something, with a few plates full of snacks and candy with them, Jane and Tarzan were on top of my house, which was still covered with toilet paper from earlier, thanks to the Oogie Boys. Phil was flirting with Aerith, while Hercules was ready to drag Phil out of their at the first warning of blood shed, Donald, Goofy, King Mickey, Daisy, Minnie, Jiminy, Huey, Dewy, and Luey were looking up, admiring the decorations, Tidus, Selphie, and Wakka, who mysteriously made it to the party were near Sora and the rest, pigging out at the snack bar, and Alice and some of the other Princesses of Heart were near the lab, and I overheard them talking about "Sushi" once or twice.

The true citizens, however, were scattered everywhere. As a matter in fact, I accidentally bumped into The Mayor, who was seen holding a large bottle of vodka. His face immediately switched to his sad face when he looked up at me.

"Oh, uh hi Jack! Hehehe!" His "hehehe" sounded pretty nervous.

"Now now Mayor, I told you that there would be no alcohol at this party."

"Oh yes, right you are! I will get rid of it right away!" He stood there for a few seconds, still looking at me.

"How about I just take it, all right?"

"Very well." I grabbed the vodka, The Mayors grip was resistingly strong, but I got it. I clutched the bottle in my hands, and walked back to my house. I unlocked the door and went up to my lab. I put the bottle in my small cooler, slammed the lid, and that was that, or so I thought.

The party went swell for most of the hour, though I did find someone who became a victim of spiking, though I am not sure what was spiked. I tried the punch, and I got nothing. Anyways, about the incident.

"And then big ol' Jafar said, 'Genie, my third wish is to make me an all power weenie!'" Slurred Aladdin.

"Uh, Al, Jafar said genie." Stated Genie.

"Oh." Aladdin hiccupped, and I smelled his breath.

"Uh oh! He's drunk! Guys, make sure he doesn't eat or drink anything intill I find out what contains alcohol!" I walked away, which I am glad I did when Al started to play with a can of 'EZ Cheese.' I knew it was The Mayor's vodka, so I would have to talk to him tomorrow.

There was also one more incident before the show. You see, Lock and the rest weren't so happy when Sora, me, and Donald beat them up, so they attempted revenge. They were all in a portapod, and they had a pack of balloons with them. They were filling them with water, and once they got them all filled, they came to some difficulties. However, at the time I wasn't too sure what was going on in there right then, but judging from what they said, I am glad they were talking about balloons. And about that time they spoke louder, so everyone could here...

"Uh, guys, it's stuck!"

"Dammit Barrel! Why did you have to have a big white one!"

"Okay, here push it!"

"No dude, your gonna break it!"

"Pull it a little!"

"Ow! It slapped back at me!" At about that time, a little splashing noise occurred.

"Oh you broke it!"

"Here, let get you another one." Then a little inflation noise was made.

"Lock, I told you to quit sucking that!"

"But it tastes good!"

"Okay, lets do it!"

Then the door opened. While most people gapped in horror in the thought of three naked kids jumping out, but instead a group of three fully dressed menaces, were holding at least 12 dozen balloons. Then Lock started to suck on a loly pop again.

"I told you to quit sucking that." Said Shock.

"ATTACK!" They screamed in unison. They started to plummet Sora, Donald, Goofy, and Me with water balloons. This went on for a good 15 minutes. 15 minutes I tell you! I finally put a stop to it, which of course involved scaring them out of their wits. Then, The Mayor got onto the stands, and held up his microphone.

"It is now time for all those who are associated in the yearly Halloween Performance to get ready for their parts and take there places." I went to the dressing rooms, where Sora and some others were getting into costume, and slipped on some garments, and I took my places. Now all I must do is wait for the first verse, and prepare...

Authors Note 2: Tidus was talking about Ripto, from Spyro: Ripto's Rage, a game from Insomniac Games. And sorry about the long update, I was going to update earlier this week, I swear! But the DSL in my neighbor hood was knocked down, so I couldn't get online at home intill today! PLEASE FORGIVE ME! NO! WAIT! DON'T RUN! NO! Oh, I think I need a hug!


	5. Return of Mediocrecy

Disclaimer: I do not own Kingdom Hearts or Nightmare Before Christmas. Yeah, is there really any point to this? Oh, and I do not own any characters here, except for Merk.

Authors Note: Hiya, I'm back! I decided to continue the story after all, how cool is that? I've decided to give up the whole POV thing, it just wasn't my style. Well, lets continue on!

_After the performance..._

The party continued on, the citizens were praising Jack as usual, although they had also took on a profound interest in Sora. After one of the ghouls declared that they wanted Sora's children, he immediately slipped away from the crowd, and there he found Riku, who was being psychologically tortured by Ansem and Sephiroth.

"Don't listen to that pretty boy, I'm your father!" Yelled Ansem in a mocking voice.

"No Riku, I'm your father! The resemblance is too much to deny!" Sephiroth laughed.

"STOP IT! LEAVE ME ALOOOONE!" Cried Riku.

It pained Sora to see his best friend in the world tortured like this, so he decided to step in.

"Oh come on, Riku couldn't be the son of any of you! I get more out of him in play fighting then what you two were able to do!"

Both of the villains stood there grimacing.

"Besides, loosing to a kid Sephiroth? You have killed nearly everyone and everything I hold dear, and you lost to him?" Cloud Strife walked towards them, with a small smirk on his face.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Sora asked Cloud accusingly.

"Now now Cloud, I've heard you were also beaten by this child." Sephiroth said, he was getting angry now.

"I let him win, you just plain lost." Cloud had done it, Sephiroth jumped into the air, and lunged at Cloud with his Masamune. Cloud took a step to the left. Sephiroth's cold, cruel blade went through the flesh of- Wakka's ham sandwich?

"This, this can't be real!" Wakka stuttered as he looked upon his sandwich, tears formed in his eyes.

"Do not worry, soon your ham sandwich's spirit energy will go back to the planet, as the cycle always has. It will be another bit of energy that will be absorbed when I gain full power, when my plan falls into order." Sephiroth said, with words as cold as his blade.

"Shut up, I don't care about your stupid plan or the natural order of things! My ham sandwich is gone! It will never laugh again, it won't get happy, get sad, it can never cry, or get angry.."

"What, don't tell me you have feelings."

"Of course I have feelings! Who do you think I am?"

"Don't be a fool. You are not really sad, nor are you angry. Because you are... a dumb ass."

As it turns out, this went on for about 30 minutes. I really don't feel like typing all of that, so woop de freakin' da.

Anywho, Sora eventually walked away, he thought it was all a little too silly. Ansem had done the same, going a separate path. Ansem was able to alliance the party's villains (Except Sephiroth, who was having too much fun mocking Wakka) and together, they were able to make the bestest table fort ever!

"Ooooh! Can I join you guys?" Seymour Guado asked.

"Bring me some taffy, and you got yourself a deal." Ansem bargained.

The party was going successful, when all the sudden, a man with a black robe, black boots, and a black rose tattoo on his forehead was in the arms of a large ghoul with an ax imbedded in it's head.

"Ey, let me go! I was only under orders, orders I tell yeh!" The man said while trying to struggle.

Jack immediately knew who it was.

"I know you! You are-" Jack started, but was cut off.

"-Merk, I'm a Mercenary hired by some weird guy." The man said.

"By whom?"

"I dunno, he was a giant potato bag or somethin', I dunno!"

Jack froze. He knew exactly who it was. "Oogie!" He exclaimed. "What is he up to now!" Jack said threateningly.

"I dunno, all he said was to distract you, keep yeh busy while he does something!"

Jack sighed. He gave orders to have the man locked up. On a lighter note, he said to continue the party as normal, and have a few select people search around the party's outer limits, incase if anything suspicious was going on.

_Meanwhile..._

Oogie smiled. "Dupe meh twice, shame you Jack. Do that WITHOUT expecting some revenge, shame on that Bone Head!"

_Back at the party..._

"Hey Selphie, wanna do it?" Asked Tidus with a grin.

"Don't touch me!" Selphie replied.

"NOT FAIR, I HATE YOU!" Tidus then proceeded to sulk.

**Next time, on Halloween in Halloween Town!**

Sora: If Riku removes this pumpkin' innards at less then one handful every five seconds, Wakka is gonna explode!

-  
King Mickey (to Cloud): Geostigma is the result of the body over reacting to it's unwelcome guest.

-

Jack: No Sephiroth, you can't go back into that barn, it's on fire!

Sephiroth: I have to, Pluto's in there!

-

Oogie Boogie: I have complete evidence that Yuffie Kisaragi is the murderer! I have a tape with shocking footage! Puts in tape

TV Screen: Sephiroth is seen dressed up in make-up and wearing a dress Oooh yeah! I'm a pretty lady! I'm a pretty lady! I'm a very pretty lady! Oh, keep filming Oogie!

-

Tidus: Dad, I think you're a big mean doody head and as dumb as a butt!

-

Aerith: Man, what a night. Turns head to see Burger King guy sitting in bed witb her NOOOOOOOO!

-

Conan Edogawa: It's now clear to me. The killer is- YOU!

-

Brainy Smurf: Guys, guys? Please wake up. Please! Oh my god, what have I done!


	6. Sephiroth's Couch Cushion Fort!

Authors Note: Just want to get one thing cleared up. When I originally wrote this, COM wasn't out yet, so that's the reason there is ZERO mention of the game. Trying to maintain the time period of 2003.

Okay, that is probably the stupidest thing I have ever said.

There is a brief special guest appearance at the beginning of this chapter, if you can guess who it is, you win my love and an digital cookie! YAY! There will be a second one in the story too, but a little more obvious. AKA, he is awarded the first award.

It was about an hour later after the previous events that occurred, the party would be over soon.

"Come on Selphie, pirates do cats all the time, why not us, we're in costume!"

"Tidus, where the heck did you get that information!"

"I saw a pic on the internet!"

There was a long silence.

"So, you wanna?"

SLAP!

Jack walked over to Sora, who was talking to a strange young man.

"Erm, I normally don't go to social occasions like this, I mean, I am homicidally insane, and I have done terrible things with salad tongs. It's really denting up my social life." The man said. Then, a random, frighteningly normal looking person's voice was heard over the crowd, something about gonads. Whatever it was, anyone could tell it was stupid. "Now, if you excuse me..." The man got out his machete, and proceeded to the source.

Sora backed off. This person had already creeped him out by saying that he had been talking to dead bunnies and Styrofoam Pillsbury Doughboys, and that often mutilated people in disturbing ways, people who he viewed as idiots. As the man walked away, something fell from his pocket, it appeared to be a comic.

**Sora has obtained 'Happy Noodle Boy comic'.**

"Sora, have you seen Oogie's kids?" Jack asked Sora.

"No, why?"

"I have a feeling Oogie is up to something, he always is." At that point, Donald and Goofy gave a status report.

"We couldn't find anybody, but someone drained the Gummi Ships energy cells, it would take overnight for them to charge up again!" Donald quacked.

"We won't be able to fly out of here till mornin'!" Goofy added.

Jack sighed. He would worry about this after the party. He thanked them both. Party would go on for another hour.

_After a while, there was a small funeral occurring._

Wakka had set up his ham sandwich against the wall, walked close to it, he had tears forming in his eyes. Tidus approached the sandwich, and tilted his head into the air, and howled, and walked off. Selphie saw the ham sandwich, and ran and hugged Wakka, crying for a couple of seconds, then walked off.

Wakka then held the ham sandwich in his arms, and walked into the fountain, with the strange, green liquid. He dropped the sandwich into the 'water', down miles, and miles below. This was strange, because the water only reached his knees.

_Meanwhile, with the villains..._

Seymour had came back with some taffy. The villains were all in their new lair (AKA, they got a couple of tables and put a couple of king sized blankets over it, Table Fort!

"What is the current situation?" Asked Jafar.

"It appears that Sephiroth went independent, and built himself his own Fort, out of couch cushions!" Seymour lifted the blanket a little to show that Sephiroth had arranged about 8 cushions in a little box shape, with a small window where Sephiroth stared out, glaring.

"And Ansem?"

"He ate a bunch of candy and is running around in the corn field." He lifted up the blanket again, and in the distance you can see a UFO abduct a man, who just so happened to be very tanned.

_On the UFO..._

"By abducting random drunks and stuffing metal things up their asses, the Planet Earth shall soon be under our control!" Kane said, and both him and Kodos laughed diabolically.

_Back in the table fort..._

"Now, what be the plan, Oogie? If consists of just sitting under here all night eating junk food, then I want a pillow!" Captain Hook was getting cranky.

"Yeah bug boy, get us some chips or somethin', our blood sugar level's getting lower then limbo! At least get _me_ something flammable." Hades was rather uncomfortable, he felt like he was sitting on a dead gerbil or something.

"Oh, don't even TALK about gasses! Jafar is Taco Bell king, especially in his genie mode!" Iago screeched out.

"Silent, bird." Jafar retorted.

"Now now boys, I'ma cookin' somethin' up real good!" Oogie Boogie said menacingly.

Just then Sephiroth poked his head into the fort.

"I smell gummy worms, God help you all if you do not share!" Sephiroth demanded.

_Back at the party..._

It was 11:30, the reward show had started, and The Mayor announced each one.

"Our first award will be for Most Charismatic Undead, which goes to... Bub!"

Bub the Zombie slouched onto the stage, took the trophy, and saluted the audience.

"These rewards are usually the same every year, to the same people, although we do get new comers occasionally." Said Jack to the Destiny Islanders, as well as Donald and Goofy.

"Our next award for Most Children Traumatized in a single night goes to Michael Ja-"

**WE INTERRUPT THIS FANFICTION WITH A PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCE**

Hello, I'm Steven Day, AKA Sansai Sarinatan, the author of this fanfiction. As you see here, I was about to make a Michael Jackson joke, but that's just too stupid, even by my standards, which are LOW.

The court has found Jacko innocent, in a legal sense, he did not molest anyone.

So please, STOP WITH ALL THE JOKES ALREADY! I want to remember MJ as a musician, not a wanker.

**THIS HAS BEEN A MESSAGE BROUGHT TO YOU BY THE STFU ASSOCIATION, WE MAY NOW CONTINUE WITH MORE TASTEFUL HUMOUR THEN WHAT WAS PREVIOUSLY ATTEMPTED, YOU MAY CONTINUE TO READ THIS FANFICTION**

"BUTT MUNCH!" Wakka yelled. I am not sure why, Wakka himself probably isn't so sure as well.

There was a period of award giving for the half hour. Jack of course won for Most Frightening, Riku won award for 'Best Use of Silver Hair' (which ticked off Sephiroth, and Ansem could sense it, even while being probed), The Trix Cereal Rabbit won the award for 'Most Mutilated Children Bodies' (they should've just gave him the cereal), and Tidus got an award for his extreme puberty caused perversion. Well, not really, but he did constantly try to look up Selphie's skirt though, so he could've won the award, right?

_At the Table Fort..._

"So, that is your big plan? Please tell me it's something BETTER then that, actually something THREATENING!" Seymour exclaimed.

"Hey, yah don't like it, you can go with all them other Squaresoft villains." Oogie said bluntly.

"No, that's not a good idea, they kicked me out because no one took me seriously, I mean, I threatened to kill all life in Spira! What more do they want!" Seymour sighed. He gave in.

Oogie's kids then walked into the fort.

"You guys got tha supplies?" Oogie asked. They all nodded.

"Eggs, CHECK! Water balloons, CHECK, TP, CHECK, used condoms, CHECK, Hilary Duff CD's, CHECK!" The trio said in unison.

"Ew, used condoms!" Exclaimed Barrel.

"Ew, Hilary Duff!" Exclaimed Shock.

"This is gonna be great boss! We'll be doin' the tricks this time!" Lock laughed.

"Good!" Oogie smiled.

_Back at the party..._

The party was almost over, and it was discovered that several people were drunk.

Aladdin was still drunk from the last chapter, is locked in the Town Hall right now. In another cell was Alice, who was so intoxicated she was asking people to get in HER rabbit hole. And Peter Pan got an FUI, Flying Under the Influence. People, don't drink and fly. That poor pigeon would still be in one piece if Peter had let a friend fly for him.

Jack still couldn't figure out what food item was spiked. Everyone had gone home, except for the villains, Donald and Goofy, and the Destiny Island kids.

"Since all three of our Gummi Ships are not going to be able to fly till morning, I will allow you eight to stay at my home, I have about enough room." They all chattered in agreement, and walked to their homes, while the villains plotted in their hide out. Selphie to make sure to get some of the remaining Worms Wart, which was eaten very much by Aladdin, Alice, and Peter Pan.

_Inside Jack's house..._

Sally was stitching one of her fingers back on. There was a slight accident in the kitchen, minor inconvenience. Zero flew around the room, his canine nose had detected a nice bit of pumpkin pie in the kitchen. Sally had stayed home most of the day. She never was too found of parties, she was rather shy.

She looked out the window, and saw Finklestien's Lab. When she was a young ghoul, she just hated being trapped, being thought of nothing more then an experiment, an animal. She then noticed, that there were people sneaking into the lab. She thought one of them was-

The door bell screamed. She looked down the window to see the boyish grin of her husband. She also saw he had brought along half a dozen friends. That was rather unusual. "Coming!" She ran down the stairs.

END OF CHAPTER SIX

Authors Note 2: I like how I ended this one, I sorta consider it a test of my writing skills. Not too shabby, but I'm learning. Infact, I think this is my favourite chapter so far.


	7. Oh, those kooky mad scientists!

Author's Note: I'd like to thank all my reviewers so far, even though I've only had about 10 reviews. If I get up to 15 reviews before next Friday, I will submit my next chapter sooner then scheduled date, tell people about this Fanfic!

Sally opened the door. "Hello Jack, I hope you have had a pleasant evening." Sally said in slightly meek tone. She then turned her gaze to the squad of teenagers, a duck, and a dog behind her skeleton husband.

"Even better, I had a _terrifying_ evening!" Jack grinned what would've been ear to ear, if Jack had them.

"I see you have guests over." Sally said, while Tidus waved.

"Oh, they are having troubles with their gummi ships, so they will just have to rest here tonight." The Destiny Islanders and the King's most loyal subjects walked into the small tower afterwards. Oh well, Sally didn't mind too much, she could use the company. Besides, now Jack wouldn't complain of her making too much pumpkin pie.

_With the oh so fiendish villains..._

Oogie led Seymour Guado, Jafar, Iago, Hades, and Captain Hook to the gates of Doctor Finklestien's lab, and started to sneak around in the bushes outside, except for Seymour. He was rather annoyed by all of this, he just wanted to get over with whatever they were going to do.

"Psst, hey Oogie!" Hades whispered, crouching down in one of the bushes, try hard to not torch the leaves.

"What do you want, Heck?" Oogie called Hades that just to annoy him, it worked.

"Grr... Hey, where exactly did these bushes come from?"

"Oh, I dunno, they weren't here before, that crazy old doc must've put them there a lil' while ago." The villains stumbled through the bushes, trying to get to the front porch.

"...Something smells foul..." Jafar said, as he sniffed the air in disgust.

"Oh yeah, like you're one to talk!" Exclaimed Iago. Jafar gave his charming little bird a death glare.

Captain Hook dug his hook into the ground, and lifted it up. "Ay, it be fresh manure, probably fertilizer it be!" He told them all, each one giving a look of disgust. There was a long silence, and finally Oogie spoke up.

"Hey guys, I dun feel so hot..."

_In the laboratory..._

"I'm so glad you were able to come, Hojo." Dr. Finklestien took a sip of his tea.

"As am I, my old friend." Professor Hojo put a couple more lumps in his.

"Now tell me, how did the Jenova Project go? I heard something about it about five years ago, something about your experiment, Sephiroth."

"It was a success, although not all would agree." Hojo took a sip of his tea, and laughed maniacally. "I was largely aided by Professor Gast's research, who reluctantly gave it up."

"And the child, Sephiroth I believe?"

"Oh yes, of course, I had injected the Jenova Cells while he was still in his mother's womb, my son progressed rather well, but of course he couldn't resist the manipulation of Jenova."

"One can say you won't win father of the year, but the data you collected must've been miraculous!"

"It was indeed."

There was a short silence.

"So, what have you been up to?" Hojo started.

"Oh, besides the usual thing, I have been researching the heart." Dr. Finklestien said, as Jewel walked into the room, placed on the table some biscuits. "I finally gave up on that young fool Sally, you read about her on my weblog. I got me a more obedient, efficient replacement."

Igor had walked into the room, and eyed the plate of biscuits hungrily. "Mmmm, dog biscuits!" Igor rasped.

"No Igor! These are people biscuits! Dog biscuits are on the plate in the kitchen!" Finklestien shooed away his lab assistant.

"Oh, what is of your little hunchback there, Igor?" Hojo asked.

"Oh, he's been annoying me lately, he's been the test subject for most of my experiments lately. Like tonight I tried to get some common house bushes to produce a zombifying chemical. Unfortunately, it was unsuccessful, so all it does is give anyone explosive diarrhea on skin contact." Almost on cue, screams of agony can be heard in the background, but neither of the scientists took notice.

Hojo had spit out his biscuit at that last comment. "Please Finklestien, not while I'm eating!"

_Back at Jack's House_

Sora and his friends were currently trying to figure out something to do.

"Hey, Tidus, Selphie, and Wakka, what happened to you guys while we were out and about traveling the worlds?" Riku asked.

"Oh, we went on a little adventure on our own, we may tell you someday." Selphie said. To all readers reading this: Hint hint!

Tidus didn't feel like telling the story, he was so totally bored. "Hey guys, lets just play a board game or something, just sitting around eating pie is boring."

"Good idea, the board games are kept in the closet, me and Sally will watch you in a little while, I'm going to go talk to her about a thing or two." Jack had said, and he left into the kitchen.

Riku walked over to the closet, and checked out what they have.

"Okay, lets see... Mystery Date: Lord of the Rings version?"

"Nah!" The rest said in unison.

"Diceless Yahtzee?"

"Nah!"

"Vegitales Monopoly?"

"NOOO!"

"Sweet Jesus no!" Exclaimed Tidus.

"Life: Final Fantasy style?"

"Yeah!" They all agreed.

Wakka w00ted, but fell back in the couch, managing to crash through the window, falling down the tower, and onto the ground below. Fortunatly, his fall was somehow propelled, and he landed safely into the bushes outside the laboratory.

They all had sweatdrops on their foreheads.

"We better start up the game, before you guys get too bored!" Donald said anxiously.

_In the kitchen..._

"I hope you don't mind the extra company Sally, it was rather unexpected I have to admit." Jack said, his bony fingers brushing through Sally's hair.

"Oh, it's alright Jack, I'm just a little disappointed though. I was hoping after dinner we could go to the Moonlight Hill, and spend a quiet, nice romantic evening there." She sighed, remembering he first kiss on that hill.

"I am terribly sorry about this, I will make sure to have our nice little trip tomorrow night, just you and me." Jack smiled.

"But it's the day after Halloween, you'll be terribly busy!"

"Rest assured, I know how to manage it. Besides, I'm sure that they are good kids, it will be simply a minor inconvenience! What is the worst that could happen?"

As soon as Jack spoke, Wakka they saw Wakka fall out the window.

_Half an hour later..._

Wakka had claimed the bathroom as his new home, so it dropped the available players down seven.

They had just begun the game, and all of them had job classes.

Sora was a Fighter, Riku was a Red Mage, Kairi was a White Mage, Donald was a Black Mage, Goofy was a Thief, and Tidus was a Black Belt, and Selphie, who had gotten out of Balamb Garden, a Summoner. Jack and Sally watched in amusement.

"Lets see what I got.." Sora had just spun and moved his Chocobo to the appropriate square. "You have just won the heart of Princess Sara, add a pink peg to your Chocobo." He did so, and now it was Goofy's turn. "Hu-yuck, mine says I just found 400 Gil after beating a Mud Golem."

Kairi's turn. "A small group of Forest Imps just attacked you in your sleep. If you have one or more children, they will have eaten one." She groaned, and discarded one of her blue pegs.

Tidus grinned, and held up a bag containing the little people-pegs to Selphie. "Would you care to have some of _my _children?" She asked slyly. Sighed. She knew that Tidus hanging around those Irvine and Zidane fellows was a bad idea.

_With the villains..._

They were all sitting near the fountains, groaning, except for Seymour.

"You were lucky I had a few remedies on me, or else you guys would've completely dehydrated." Seymour lectured them all.

"Ugh, sorry for torching you and stuff Hook, I couldn't control it." Hades apologized, but Hook still seemed to be in a traumatized daze.

"Alright, this time, we're gonna go into the lab through the back door this time!" Oogie said, while the others nodded in agreement.

"Why are we trying to get into the lab anyways? And where is Lock, Shock, and Barrel?" Seymour asked.

"Lock, Shock, and Barrel forgot the silly string, they're back at mah mansion gettin' it. The reason we are at the lab, is 'cause we still need one moh thing- EZ Cheese." Oogie answered.

"DUN DUN DUN!"

"Will you quit doing that?" Jafar asked.

"Eh, sorry." Iago apologized.

_Back at the house..._

"Oh, you did not just buy the shares to Shin-Ra Inc before me!" Riku exclaimed.

"Finders keepers losers weepers!" Tidus snickered.

"I'll weep you!" Riku threatened.

End of Chapter Seven

Author's Note: Yes, I may someday in the future make a fan fic based on the adventures of Tidus, Selphie, and Wakka. Only after I complete another fanfiction I plan on writing after this one...


	8. Abductions and Cute Little Dead Girls

Author's Note: A little late with the fanfic, just finished Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince, it was great!

Oh, and to answer- eh, toehaxxor? Something like that? Anyways, I might as well list all characters that were not in Kingdom Hearts, that I didn't make up.

Kane and Kodos are obviously the tentacle armed aliens from The Simpsons

Seymour Guado is from the video game Final Fantasy X

Johnny (Crazy kid) is from Johnny, the Homicidal Maniac comics by Jhonen Vasque

Bub (the zombie) is from Day of the Dead, a movie by George A. Romero

Professor Hojo is an NPC from Final Fantasy VII

Now that's all cleared up, lets get on with the show- erm, fanfiction thingy. Ah, thingy, the perfect word.

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"I KEEL YOU!" Selphie's fingers were gripped tightly around Tidus's neck. Jack and Sally were desperately trying to pull the kids apart.

"IT'S MY TURN, MINE!" Tidus choked, as Jack pulled him away from Selphie. The others looked in shock (except for Wakka, he was making regular 'URGH' noises from the bathroom.

"Is it really that hard to keep these kids entertained?" Donald whispered to Goofy.

"I don't think Sora and his best friends are like that, just those other three kids." Goofy replied.

"Yeah, they always get like this during board games." Kairi said. "I still get nightmares about 'The Clue Incident of 2003.' Lets just say, Selphie did it, in the living room, and with the blitzball."

**AT DOCTOR FINKLESTIEN'S LABORATORY...**

Oogie Boogie was rummaging through the laboratory, trying to find what he was looking for.

"Uh, lets see here." He then started to read off names of cans and potions. "Al Bhed Potion, Anti-Warts, Wolfbane Spray, Ent Viagra- hmm, wonder if Ents get morning wood."

BadumPISH!

"Now, what have I told you, Iago?" Jafar said as walked into the room.

"That I won't make comic sound effects." Iago said with an annoyed sigh.

"Ah, ah didja use da sleepin' gas on 'em?" Oogie asked.

"Err, not exactly..." Jafar replied.

"What? How is it that them two eggheads and their little lab pets won't come bustin' in hear?" Oogie barked.

"Well, I sorta panicked, so I just thrashed my head against their heads a good number of times till they got all sleepy." Jafar rubbed his heel into the ground sheepishly.

"What? Ah, that's good enough." Oogie then found it.

"What's that Oogie?" Jafar asked, eyeing the metallic spray can.

"It's SUPER THICK E-Z CHEESE!" Oogie grinned. "It's gonna be hell teh get out, ya know, Jack won't know what hit 'em!"

"Now, if you pardon me if I pry, but have I already said your plan is ridicules?" Seymour Guado walked into the room.

"Yeah yeah, at least a dozen times bah now. Where's Hades and Hook?" Oogie asked.

"Well, Hook is still out of it, avoiding Hades at all costs, and avoids having Hades's back turned to him. He's currently in the corner sobbing. Hades decided to doodle on the unconcious people's faces with permanent marker. 'Boogie's Boys', which is a strange thing to call them, seeing as they have one girl, anyways, had joined him." Seymour had given his status report.

"Man, ah wonder 'bout Ansem and Sephiroth..." Oogie trailed off.

**IN AN EMPTY FIELD...**

Sephiroth was walking down the large crop field at Halloween Town's border. It was difficult to navigate through the thick corn stalks, but luckily for him he'd find a few small area's where something had made the crops bent over, but not broken. He had came out here as soon as he saw his friend Ansem disappear out in the distance, with a bright, green light beam. He had to admit that it was creepy out here, only other sound he could here other then the ones the crickets and himself made, he could here a small rustling sound, perhaps only about several yards away. His pace quickened, the other's quickened too. He got into a clearing when-

BUMPTH!

"Ow, what are you doin'out in the middle of the night, running into little girls and- woah, cool sword!"

Sephiroth had ran into the strangest looking little girl he had ever seen. She appeared to be about nine or ten years old, and was wearing a long, thick black dress, with a white flap and black tie, something you would dress up a corpse at a funeral. Her blond hair, medium length seemed to had been drained of life in colour. Her skin was pale, and her left eye...

"Erm, yes, it's a one of a kind. So tell me, what are you doing out here yourself?" Sephiroth asked.

She shrugged. "I dunno, felt like I, 'spose. Who are you?"

"My name is Sephiroth, yours?" Sephiroth wasn't certain to say anything else.

"Lenore." She said. Her attention gazed upward. "That's funny."

Sephiroth looked up, he saw a flashing light in the sky, and immediately knew what it was. "We gotta go, before they abduct us!" He said, grabbing Lenore (despite protesting), probably because she gave off the an 'Hug me or I'll destroy you' atmosphere about her. But despite his efforts, he saw overhead the flying saucer. It shot out an tractor beam, he let go of Lenore, who's reaction was 'Oooh, aliens!'. Sephiroth grabbed onto a stalk of corn, but all he had succeeded was having his pants sucked off. He finally gave in, his screams could be heard in the night...

**BACK AT THE LAB...**

"Ah suppose they're probably doin' fine." Oogie had said. He found his men had practically smeared maker on Hojo's normally pail face, Finklestien had little scribbles and things like flowers and kitties drawn on him, Jewel was given facial hair, while there were several games of Tic Tac Toe on Igor's head. The villains packed up, and started towards Jack's house...

**AT JACK'S HOME...**

Selphie had decided to become a puppeteer, and decided to put on a show, with sock puppets!

"I am 'da Dark Lord Sauron, and I have forged 'da One Ring, TOO RULE DEM ALL!" Bellowed the left hand puppet.

"Oh, but I am the Dark Lord Voldemort, my soul is shatter-" The right hand puppet was interrupted.

"SPOILER AND YOU DIE!" Sora threatened Selphie. While Selphie went on with the show, Sora and Riku tried to get into conversation.

"Hey, Sora?" Riku asked.

"Yeah?" Said Sora.

"What do you think about, well, you know what happens at the end." Riku said.

"Oh, you mean when-" Sora was cut off, as a Hilary Duff CD was thrown through the closed window, and broke through the bathroom door.

"AHHH! THAT SCARED DA CRAP OUT OF ME, yah!" He exclaimed. "Huh, that's one way to get it out..."

Jack stood up, and went to the door. Almost immediately the house was bomb barded with eggs, water balloons splashed at the door steps, and they made sure to through the used condoms through the broken window. Jack found Boogie's Boys pelting eggs and various items, while Hook ran around throwing TP on top of the house and a dead tree near it. Hades was spraying silly string on everything he could, Jafar was knocking down the mail box, Iago's commentary didn't help. Oogie was face to face with Jack and sprayed some of his Super Thick EZ Cheese onto Jack's skull. Seymour simply sulked while leaning against the gate.

"We're under attack!" Tidus screamed, as an egg had shot into the house, and cracked hard on an old radio, a rather up beat tune started to play...

_Final Fantasy is an RPG  
The only one that I need  
It's the RPG for me  
Final Fantasy is all that I play  
All other games are lame  
It puts them all to shame_

Jack was annoyed, but what could he do? "Everyone, open the windows!" Jack ordered. They hesitated, but obeyed.

_I only play games that are popular  
I only buy the games the magazines tell me to buy  
That way I know I get good games for sure  
I may have a shallow mind  
But you can kiss my behind_

The windows were all opened, then Jack took a microscope, and threw it down at the villains, giving Hook a good bump on the head.

"Find whatever we can give up, we can't let them do this!" Shouted Sora, thus a battle began...

_Final Fantasy; it consumes my life  
And that is probably why  
I'll never have a wife  
Final Fantasy has awesome music  
And that is probably why it  
Always gets remixed_

Selphie had started throwing some various food items in the kitchen, pleased to find Hades discovered a wad of gelatin had replaced his flaming hair.

_I always buy the soundtrack to each game  
Oh it is the only thing that I will listen to  
Oh sure one day it may drive me insane  
You may think that I'm a fool  
Well I'm here to say "Screw you!"_

Kairi had gotten a face full of what she had hoped to be just a white water balloon full of mayonnaise. She screamed, and ran to the bathroom. The villains had gotten higher aims, and even more disturbing items were being thrown now.

_Final Fantasy on PlayStation 2  
With music by Nobuo  
And graphics by Wong Chu  
It is Final Fantasy number ten  
Must save the world again  
Right here from my own den_

Tidus then had a genius idea. He saw Kairi impatiently waiting outside the door. He told her to use the kitchen sink, and then opened the door, and grabbed Wakka. He screamed in protest. Tidus ran back with Wakka, and shoved his Besaidian ass out the window.

_Hopefully I'll get through the game just fine  
I don't know why I continue to play each game  
They'll be making these 'til the end of time  
Oh I guess that I will pay  
For these new games 'til Doomsday _

Tidus squeezed Wakka, and the villains were greeted with not so pleasant surprise...

**DOWN BELOW...**

Oogie's men groaned in disgust as a wave of brown rained down from the roof top, coming from the most unholy thing. Seymour instincively ran as soon as Wakka's butt was seen, and ran towards the crop fields. Oogie and his minions ran, cursing Jack Skellington's name.

**ON A UFO...**

Kane and Kodos looked at the latest capture. They had yet to give the young female the probe treatment, as already the silver haired men went through. They were quite perplexed.

"This young girl is different then any other specimen we have captured!" Kane said.

"Hey, are you trying to say I'm special?" Lenore asked accusingly.

"In a way..." Kane replied. Lenore just shrugged.

"This goes beyond normal human anatomy, her main organs such as the heart are inactive!" Exclaimed Kodos. "Which means that we have been lied to by human anatomy! We shall rage war on the humans!" The aliens laughed, while Ansem and Sephiroth wept, their anuses were still soar, and they had strange headgear.

Lenore however, had proceeded to unknowingly talk to another alien race.

"Ah, so at last you speak with us, Rigelians!" A high pitched, sinsiter voice came over the intercom.

"Is this a karaoke machine?" Asked Lenore.

"A what?" The voice asked.

Lenore grabbed a microphone, and began to sing a horribly off key version of the 'Trogard the Burninater' song.

"Gah, you dare make a mockery out of me by your ear poison? You will curse the day you got on the great Invader Zim's bad side!" The voice then stopped, and seconds later, the ship started to vibrate, a damage report was printing on the screens, and a single Irken ship had been blasting at the UFO. The aliens had seen Lenore standing by the communications center.

"What have you done, you've caused the Irkens to go to war with Rigel 4!" Kodos exclaimed.

"Heh, that rhymed! Lenore said with glee.

**BACK IN JACK'S HOME, HALF AN HOUR LATER...**

They were all sitting on the couch. Kairi's cheeks were red and sore from the constant scrubbing, she still claimed to taste salt. They had all already agreed to take a vow of silence, not to tell anyone else about what just happened, EVER again.

"Well, me and Sally are going to retire, you may rest here for the night." Jack said as he and Sally went to their room.

There was an awkward silence.

"Well, atleast Kairi can never say she's never gotten a facial." Tidus said at last. The next thing he knew, he was being flung out the window by a Selphie and Kairi tag team.

**AT THE CROP FIELD...**

Seymour walked through the cornfield. He knew that the plan would end badly. Why did he join? Was it because he was lonely, that the other FF Villains or the rabid fans never took him seriously? Probably so. He sighed, when he saw a strange object crash a few feet in front of him. It looked like a traditional sci-fi Flying Saucer, but was badly damaged. A small opening way unrolled like a red carpet, and a door opened. An octopus like alien opened a door way, carrying a strange, little dead girl.

"GET OUT!" He yelled, flinging Lenore at Seymour. Seymour stumbled as she took a grip on his head, and eventually fell over. The aliens then proceeded to repair the ship.

Lenore, however, had taken an interest into bobbing up and down a 'leg' of Seymour's bizarre hair. "Your hair reminds me of the aliens." Lenore told him.

Seymour cried.

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Author's Note: Well, only a chapter or so left of my story. Almost done.

The character Lenore is from a comic series by Roman Dirge, named (of couse) Lenore.

The song Robo Chocobo Voice is a remix of the chocobo theme, done by Joe Redifer.


	9. End of Mediocrecy

Author's Notes: This is the last chapter of my story, I'm afraid. Don't look so glum, I'm gonna write a few smaller fanfictions for a bit, then proceed with my more serious, epic, but still tongue in cheek Kingdom Hearts fanfic. Two of them I already have mapped out in my own head. Oh well, enjoy the final chapter!

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_IN THE MIDDLE OF THE CROP FIELD..._

The disgusted villains ran, smeared with the liquid feces that had emerged from Wakka's anus.

"Ugh, so horribly defeated, I will kill that bonehead Jack for what he done to me!" Oogie yelled. "NOBODY DISRESPECTS ME, NOBODY!" Oogie was then smacked hard by Hades.

"DONE TO YOU! DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW MUCH YEARS OF PSYCHIATRIC HEALING IT'LL TAKE US TO GET RID OF TONIGHT'S MEMORY!" Hades screamed at Oogie.

"Especially Hook, isn't that right Pirate?" Jafar asked the traumatized Captain.

"HAWAHAHAHONOOOOOJEDUFUGWAWAWA!" Captain Hook burgled.

"My feathers are ruined, TAINTED FOREVER!" Iago screeched.

The villains then proceeded to wail on The Boogieman, when an UFO appeared overhead, all of them were engulfed in an orange light. They were all abducted, and the Flying Saucer proceeded to go back to its home planet, to bring back their new specimens. Without warning, the Saucer started to wobble, loosing the swift and eerie feel to it. It then started to descend, back into the atmosphere of Halloween Town, crashing down into the field below, once again...

_IN THE SHIP..._

"Gugh, what kind of stench is it?" Kodos asked, trying to block it by sticking a pine air freshener onto it's helmet.

"It is even more horrible then a Blargian Space Port! I CAN SMELL IT THROUGH MY SPACE HELMET!" Kang gagged.

"What's worse is, that this is this is our third crash tonight!" Said Kodos with a look of despair.

"Third? What was the first one?" Sephiroth was curious.

"We went by Earth today, in the Town of Spingfield specifically, we got drunk, some bald fat man and a couple of others beat us half to death, and stole our vessel!" Replied Kang.

All the villains proceeded to roar with laughter. The two aliens, who were filled with extreme anger against their specimens, proceeded to push a button that would send 10,000 volts to the villains loins.

_BACK AT JACK'S HOUSE..._

It was lights out. Jack and Sally were sound asleep upstairs, with Zero curled up at the foot of their bed. The rest of the party were all asleep, except for Donald, who had gone to get a glass of water and a midnight snack, Tidus and Selphie were awake, because they were just sorta wired.

"Man, I wish Jack had a TV here, you know? We could atleast catch a late night B-Movie or something..." Said Tidus, trying to start a conversation with Selphie.

"Er, yeah..." Selphie actually liked to be alone with Tidus, he seemed to be less showy, and a lot less of a pervert too.

"Well, I guess I am sorry, for a lot of things I have done, that I wouldn't have done normally." Tidus said.

"It's okay, I forgive you." Selphie drew in Tidus, in for a passionate embrace, their lips met, and they began to kiss, softly at first, but with each moment-

"EHEHM!" Donald was in the archway to the kitchen, with a glass of water and a drumstick.

Selphie and Tidus pulled away from each other. "Oh, hello there Donald!" Said Selphie.

"I will never understand you kids, I swear to god." Donald muttered, and went back to his spot on the floor. Selphie and Tidus went back to the couch, and went back to bed...

_AT THE COMPUTER DESK..._

My character reprehensive, Hontura The Dragon was huddled over his computer, looking at the last few lines he had just written.

"It is official, I SUCK at writing romance!" I said.

"Oh, you're not too bad, you just wrote that one a little too quickly." Sansai Sarinatan, one of his mutes responded.

"Yeah, even for hormone driven teenagers, that was a little tooo quick, plus you were a little nervous, since you have no personal experience to testify to." His other muse Helandor bluntly said.

"SHUT UP!" I sulked, and continued to write this fanfiction...

_IN THE MORNING..._

Jack yawned. It was time to bring these guys home. The Gummi Ships had been repaired, everyone was waiting in their seats as Chip and Dale filled them up with fuel.

"I finally found out what was spiked last night!" Jack said.

"What?" Selphie asked.

"The Worms Wart stew you brought in last night. Zero got into it, and unfortunately Zero is afraid to come out of the closet now." Jack told her.

"Aw, that sucks." Tidus had decided to also to go into Jack's ship.

In another ship, Donald was ranting to Goofy what happened last night.

"And they went at it just like that, I will never understand kids these days, never!" He ranted.

Goofy had just figured out how to blow bubbles off of his tongue. "Sorry Donald, what were you saying?" Goofy asked. Donald fell backwards, anime style.

Wakka, who was in Donald and Goofy's ship this time, also blew bubbles off his tongue.

In Sora's ship, there was an entirely different discussion going on.

"Oh no, I just realized! How are we going to explain to our parents where we have been for the last 24 hours!" Sora exclaimed, and the others gasped.

"Oh no, our parents will kill us!" Kairi panicked, her mother would probably be worried sick by now.

"I'd hate to think of what Tidus's dad, Jecht will do to him..." Said Riku grimly. The ships were now ready to go, they all said good bye to the citizens, and took off for home. The flight was a pleasant one, they had stopped off at Hollow Bastion to greet some old friends, but were off quickly. On their way back, they once again encountered the UFO.

Sora's ship received the signal, and there was Sephiroth, with some strange, alien headgear attached to his skull. Romanian pop music was playing loudly in the background, the aliens and the villains were dancing, and Sephiroth, mouthed the infamous lyrics...

_Ma-ia-hii  
Ma-ia-huu  
Ma-ia-hoo  
Ma-ia-haha_

That began a Numa Numa Dance Party! They all did their own little moves, Wakka (who's diarrhea had disappeared after the attack last night) tried to do a few break dance moves, but accidentally turned off the oxygen in Donald and Goofy's ship for a few seconds. The party went on for about another hour, but like all good things, it came to an end.

They arrived a little later then planned on the Destiny Islands, they were each still singing the lyrics.

_Vrei sa pleci dar nu ma, nu ma iei,  
Nu ma, nu ma iei, nu ma, nu ma, nu ma iei.  
Chipul tau si dragostea din tei,  
Mi-amintesc de ochii tai_

Tidus was giddily humming the song , but all his cheer had went from his body when he saw his father, waiting at the doorstep, looking RATHER pissed.

"You better have a good reason WHY you were gone all day and night, on Halloween, before I shove a blitzball in every opening in your body!" Jecht roared.

"I- erm, that is, I made out with a girl last night." Tidus said without thinking.

There was a brief silence, and finally, Jecht spoke.

"Alright, go inside and let your mother yell at you for a bit. She saved your dinner from last night and tonight." Jecht said. Tidus walked into the house, feeling relieved. What a great party.

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Well, that's all for now, the end of this story! Just so you know, I will never, EVER reference this story in any other Kingdom Hearts fanfiction I will ever write. EVER. Also, look out for in October, there will be a new chapter to this story each week, explaining the little things and questions you may or may not have. The last of those will be on October 31st. Why? More readers will read a Halloween related fanfic in October! See yah guys! Look out for a fanfic called 'Squall vs. The Wall' as well!


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